Importance of Walking

Walking 20 minutes can add to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
To spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
Home at $7000 per month.
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My grandpa started walking
Five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
And we don't know where he is.
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I like long walks,
Especially when they are taken
By people who annoy me.
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I have to walk early in the morning,
Before my brain figures out what I'm doing.
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I joined a health club last year,
Spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there?
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Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
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The advantage of exercising every day
Is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he?'
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If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
Start with a small country.
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I know I got a lot of exercise
The last few years ...
Just getting over the hill.
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We all get heavier as we get older,
Because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
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AND
Every time I start thinking too much
About how I look,
I just find a Happy Hour
And by the time I leave,
I look just fine.
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You could run this over to your friends,
But it's much easier to just e-mail it to them!