Translator

These jokes are of an unknown origin. Feel free to submit corrections or add to the list. I will edit when possible, to improve the flow and correct errors.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Jewish Salesman

In the late 1960's it was decided to get rid of the last Jewish member of the Polish politburo.
So he was sent off to sell Polish cars to the Germans.
Two weeks later, he returned with a signed contract.
Surprised but still eager to oust the Jew, they sent him off to the United States to sell Polish computers.
A month later he comes home, signed contracts overfilling his briefcase.
Stunned, but now more determined than before, the politburo sends him off to the People's Republic of China to sell Polish rice.
Months pass and the Poles are glad they haven't heard from him.
Then one day, about six months after he left, he shows up for their regularly scheduled meeting, signed contract in hand.
"But... how did you manage it?" they demand.
"It was tough" he acknowledged.
"It took me six months to find another Jew."

About Me

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I'm author of History in a Year by the Conservative Voice aka History of the World in a Year by the Conservative Voice.

I'm the Conservative Voice. 

I'm looking to make contact with those who might use my skill. 

I have an m-audio mobile pre amp fed by the audiotechnica 2041sp condensor mic pack. Prior to 15/4/06, I'd used a Shure sm-58 that required a nuclear blast to register a sound or the internal mic of my aged imac, which has a penchance to recording my breathing. I also used a Griffin itrip, until the community convinced me it was not hiding my talent as well as the other mics.

I am a Writer and an occasional Math Teacher (Sir, what's the occasion?). I like to sing, having no instrumental talent (cannot even clap in time, and yes, I'm aware singing badly IS obnoxious). 

I have performed the finale to Les Miserables before an audience of 500. I have also sung before a similar audience (students, parents) renditions of 'I Will' (Beatles), 'Mr Cairo' (Jon Vangelis) and 'I am Australian' (Seekers). Now I seek another profession because the audience hates me ..

Ignore my politics, the media does 

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